Extermination Problems
by D45 and S27
Summary: Relena must be dealt with! So the exterminator is called...R&R!


Disclaimers: Don't own, don't sue...not makin' money, boo-hoo.  
  
WARNINGS!!!: Mindless Relena-Bashing cuz it makes the world go 'round! Melting Quatre,  
plotless, WOASR, I was bored. That's it.  
  
Author Note: This is outta the blue, like any other fic. It was originally an e-mail.  
Elaine chose the color red for some reason, and I don't know what she was  
talking about either. So...she doesn't really like Q-man...or Relena. So,  
I put this thing together, and figured, "What the jigoku! I'll post the  
thing. So, that's it. C'ya @ the bottom.  
  
Dedications: This is dedicated to Elaine Wang aka Altojaz. For just being my friend.  
  
  
~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~  
  
Extermination Problems  
  
By: S27  
  
~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~  
  
  
Quatre- *Sitting on couch* Why does she always have to torment *ME*? I mean...  
I didn't DO anything to her.  
  
Melissa- *Eats pocky* Maybe because you're weaker than her.  
  
Quatre- I'm not weak.  
  
Melissa- Not 'physically'. 'Mentally'. *S27 snickers because Elaine's gonna 'TRY'   
to lay a punch on her for just puttin' that down*  
  
Quatre- Oh? Is that so?  
  
Duo- *Enters* He~y! What's happenin'?  
  
Melissa- Nothing really. But you ran outta pocky. *Gets up, and goes for a soda*  
  
Duo- WHAT?!?!   
  
Trowa- ...  
  
Heero- Shut up.  
  
Duo- You ALWAYS say that! Can't you be A LITTLE more elaborate?  
  
Heero- ...Sure...  
  
Duo- .............I'm wai~ting.  
  
Heero- Omae o korosu.  
  
Annoying Shierking Voice- Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeero!!!!   
  
Duo- Oh boy.  
  
Quatre- Red? Red? RED?! Why?  
  
Melissa- Mentally...I guess. *Comes back, and sits in a recliner*  
  
Trowa- ...  
  
Melissa- Oh look. A pest is trying to break through the safe house window. That's not  
new.  
  
A.S.V.- Heeeeeeeeeeero! *CRASH* Why haven't you killed me yet?!  
  
Duo- What kind of question is THAT?! HEY! And that was a NEW window!  
  
Relena- You keep out of this you moron!  
  
Duo- Heero! She called me a moron!  
  
Heero- .........Hn........Both of you shut up.....  
  
Duo- Is that ALL you can say?!  
  
Heero- ...Yeah...  
  
Trowa- .......  
  
Melissa- Okay...who let the pest in with out permittion?  
  
Quatre- ......Red? Red? Why red? Out of ALL of the colors...why red?   
  
Melissa- I gotta call the exterminator now. *Picks up phone and dials a number* Hello?   
Hi. Yes. There's a pest in here, and it's VERY annoying. It's a Relena. It shierks,   
and- Hello? Hel-   
  
*CRASH!!! The door busts open as Elaine Wang stomps in complete with the 5000 Wang   
spray for pest, and gas mask*  
  
Duo- Well! There goes the door! A window, and a door. All in the same night! Perfect!  
What next? The ceiling???  
  
Heero- ...Shut up...  
  
Elaine- Okay...What's it look like? And where is it?!   
  
Melissa- *Totally forgetting Quatre* It's a blonde, and it should be SOMEWHERE   
in this room.  
  
Elaine- Excellent! *Approaches Quatre* Ah ha! The pest!!! *Sprays Quatre*  
  
Quatre- AHHHH!!! SAVE ME TROWA! I'M MELTING!!! *Poor Quatre melts into a pile of...  
'Quatre goo'*  
  
Trowa- ......Ew......  
  
Melissa- HEY!!! That's not the pest!!!  
  
Elaine- *Shrugs* Hmm...It's not?  
  
Melissa- What do ya mean 'Hmm...It's not'?! That's Quatre! You just killed my friend!  
  
Elaine- Oh? I thought that you called me to exterminate a Quatre.   
  
Melissa- It was a RELENA!  
  
Elaine- Well? Where is it, and what does it look like?  
  
Melissa- *Covers ears as a shierking voice fills the room* It's that shierking thing!  
  
Elaine- Eh, eh, eh...*Runs up to Relena, and sprays her*  
  
Relena-  
HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE...eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeerrrrrccccc  
cccccrrrrrrrrrroooooooooccccccccccccccccccccckkkkkkkkkkkkkkk(crock)*Melts into a   
puddle of...'Relena goo'*  
  
Elaine- That'll be 50 bucks.  
  
Melissa- *Turns to Duo* Duo? You got any spare change?  
  
Duo- Is that what you call spare change?! 50 bucks?! *Turns to Elaine* Are you CRAZY???!!!   
  
Melissa- Don't answer that.   
  
Elaine- Do you have the money or not?  
  
Melissa- Why 50? It's 25 bucks for one.  
  
Elaine- I exterminated 2 you moron.  
  
Melissa- But I called you to extermine 1! 1,1,1,1,1,1,1,1,1,1,1,1,1,1,1,1,  
oooooooooooooooooooonnnnnnnnnneeeeeeee!!!  
  
Elaine- But I extermined 2! 2,2,2,2,2,2,2,2,2,2,2,2,2,2,2,2,  
ttttttttttttwwwwwwwwwwwwoooooooooooooo!!!  
  
Melissa- What the bananas! You charge us extra for your inconvince!!! INJUSTICE!!!  
Shimatta on a gazel's uncle! I sound like Wufei!!!  
  
Elaine- I still killed two. So pay up. This spray is hard to get!  
  
Trowa- *Hands Elaine 50 bucks* ....  
  
Elaine- Thanks!  
  
Melissa+Duo- *Sweat drop and left eye twitches dramatically* But? But? But- Heero?   
What do YOU have to say 'bout all of this?  
  
Heero- ...She got rid of Relena didn't she?  
  
M+D- *Face fault* Go figure.  
  
Heero- ...What was the point of that?  
  
Duo- ...*Shrugs* I dunno...  
  
Melissa- ...My life sucks...  
  
Heero- That's YOUR problem...  
  
Elaine- Ahh! *Sees Relena germs* AHH!!! *Sprays chair, table, couch, and window. Then   
takes another chair, and throws it at the wall and sprays it* AHHH!!! RELENA GERMS!!!  
  
Duo- There goes the chair, and the wall.  
  
Wufei- *Enters room* What's goin' on?!  
  
Heero- ...Extermination problems...  
  
Trowa- .........  
  
  
~Owari~  
  
  
~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~  
  
  
Author Note: That was it. All feedback welcomed. Frankly, I think Q is cool, but since  
I wrote this for Altojaz, she can get a kick outta it. R&R! Ja~!!!  
  
  



End file.
